Not sure what God is doing....

So, I have been trying to pray more deliberately about the personal stuff. I have had several situations where I was confused about how to pray. Here is one example: I found out last week that I was going to need some roof repair on my building in Granbury. It was going to be costly. I found myself wondering how to pray. Do I pray that there is hail damage so the insurance will pay for it? It seems a little silly because either there "is" or there "isn't". It's not like God is going to make a roof be hail damaged if it isn't.

So, I decided that it would be good to pray for a "fair" adjustor. I didn't ask for a miracle or a change in the roof structure, just a fair adjustor. The adjustor came out on Tuesday. He took pictures and showed them to me and indicated that most likely it was a materials defect and not hail damage. However, he said that he would like to come out again and look at the roof when it wasn't wet. Apparently, roofs look different when they are dry. (It's important to note that I felt very comfortable with this adjustor. He did not seem to be blowing smoke or trying to wiggle out of a claim. I really felt like he was taking it seriously and trying to be fair...an answer to prayer so it seems)

So, yesterday he calls and asks to meet my roofer guy and building manager there at 9:00am today. I got everyone there (I didn't go so that I wouldn't miss any more work). I again wondered how do I pray? I can't pray that the adjustor lies about it just to cover it for me. I can't pray that it magically appear to be hail damage. So, I just say to God: "God, I know that you have many ways to provide for this issue. I am just asking that you provide for this need however you see fit. Help the adjustor to be fair and open to what he sees. I trust that you have all kinds of resources and I can't ask for anything other than a fair decision from the insurance company."

My phone rings at 9:40am and it is my roofer and he says "Derek (insurance adjustor) has agreed to pay for it". I about dropped the phone. I asked him a lot of questions and he tells me that there was a little bit of hail damage but that most of the issues are probably material defects. But, because there was some damage he agreed to pay for it.

I have not received the official document saying they are going to pay for it or how much they are going to pay....so I am cautiously optimistic.

However, I am so grateful for the way this need is being met. I am shocked because yesterday Derek indicated it was a slim to none chance that it would be covered.

So, what is God doing here? Maybe He was in these details of my life??? If it hadn't turned out this way would I have come to the conclusion that He wasn't in the details? I was really trying not to connect how God works with how this situation was playing out.

This is where it gets sticky for me. I want to give God credit for things that are blessings. Yet, when I do that it makes the hard things more difficult to understand and connect to a cause.

The truth is....I don't know whether God did this for me or not...I don't know if God had something to do with the scholarship I received last week or if that was just a nice benefit for making good grades.....I don't know if my grades this semester are a direct affirmation that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing or if they were just the result of hard work.....I want to believe that God has been in all of this.....and mostly I do....but, if He is in all these details where was He on June 16, 2005?

I can't seem to reconcile this in my brain...which affects how I pray and what I pray....

Regardless, I am overwhelmed right now with the way several things have played out to my favor.

And....on top of that.....my tenant told me I had done an excellent job the past few months working through some of these drainage issues....my jaw dropped to the floor when those compliments came....It was really strange because I kept waiting for the slap in the face that usually occurs every time I visit the building...but it never came....our relationship has really improved and I can't quite get used to the way I am now being treated by them....I think maybe I have earned a little bit of their respect and trust....just a little bit....it's still a fragile relationship but we have come a long ways...

I don't know what God is doing.....I know I am trying to do my part....and it appears that God is doing way more than His part....and for that I am grateful.