It's for my kids....

When I first started blogging I think it was about trying something new....reaching out into the world of technology and pretending like I knew what I was doing....

Then it became about "getting some stuff out"....blogging helped me put into words the complicated emotional world I live in....and that helped me....and I connected with some people that I never would have connected with had I not opened up and allowed this to become an important part of my healing process...


Now...I think maybe this blog is for my kids....I want them to know how we worked through the loss of their dad....and we have worked at it really hard...I plan to someday share this with them....so they will know how much I loved him....so they will know how hard we tried to remember him and honor him...because I think I would want to know as much as I could about my dad and about how things happened....and I guess I think they probably will too....

And so....I am thinking of writing some posts that would describe what happened the day he died....the day after...at the funeral...things I remember now that I don't want to forget....things that might be helpful to them someday....

I don't know if it will ever mean anything to them....but I feel the need to organize some of the memories....so that if they do want to know more about what it was like to live through those first few hours, days and months....they will have a way to learn about it...

So...some explanation perhaps....because this blog may change to more of my own memories of the events that have happened...in hopes that these memories will provide healing for my kids someday as they continue to grieve and regrieve the loss of their dad....