Saturday, August 04, 2007

Write Shelly, Write

Ok, just had to take a break....I am on page 18 of my paper...still 7 pages to go....write Shelly, write....

Interesting conversations worth noting:

Braden (who is now four, he was two when Brian died) has started talking A LOT about his daddy....it's like the floodgates have opened up lately...it may stop as soon as it started, but it is rather interesting to watch.....the thing he keeps repeating over and over and over is this...."daddy loved me a whole, whole lot"....and "daddy built us a safe house to live in because he loves us"....and "when I grow up I want to be a daddy".....I don't know why he has opened up so much lately, I suppose that I am probably talking less about Brian than before.....just interesting....

Braden said to me the other day, "mommy, girls don't die do they?" I said "yes they do, we all die but it will be a long, long, long time before mommy dies". I know, I can't guarantee that but the odds are that it is true....and he doesn't need a lenghty disclaimer before every statement I make, now does he?

Braden, Lexi and Nathan had a long discussion about heaven the other night. They all determined that their daddy would run to them and hug them and hold on to them so tight he might choke them and then he would kiss mommy...and that he probably ran to Brewster and great pawpaw and hugged them too when he saw them in heaven... I just listened to the conversation as we were driving. It was interesting to listen to it unfold....wish I had an audio recording of it...I couldn't help but smile as I was listening....gosh it feels good to be able to hear that kind of stuff and smile and not fall apart like I used to....yes, it still sucks that they have to live without their daddy, but the pain is not anywhere near where it was during the first year or two....


Guess that is all for now....back to writing the real paper....but this was a nice diversion....

1 comment:

Laura said...

That is good to hear...

That's interesting that Braden is talking more about Brian. Maybe he is trying to sort it all out. Who knows...

I can just imagine the conversation that took place in the car with the kiddos about Heaven. It sounds like they have a pretty healthy understanding of Heaven and that they aren't afraid or too upset to talk about it. It helps I'm sure to have a mom who talks openly about their Daddy and how much he loved them. You're doing a great job!

Keep writing that paper. Remember just 7 more to go. That's better then 25. Just keep writing, just keep writing.