Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Losing Perspective

Its happened again.....I have lost perspective...I have allowed myself to get so focused on fear that I have lost the big picture.

The circumstances of my life right now shouldn't dictate how I respond or react....circumstances shouldn't have so much control over my outlook....

I am beyond frustrated with having to wear a hat that doesn't fit me.....I am letting it get to me....

I just want to be a mom, an employee and maybe a student........not a business person, a landlord, a general contractor, a dad, etc.....etc...

I am not a good landlord.....I am not an entrepreneur.....and the last thing in the world that I should be doing is trying to make decisions about what kind of drainage system I need to solve some of the issues I am having at the commercial property....

I don't like the games....I don't like trying to figure dishonest people out.....I don't like trying to chase down people to do the things they said they would do.....I don't like bugging my CPA to PLEASE try to get my taxes done by the deadline....

I just want to be responsible for me and my three children......

Is that too much to ask......

I've lost perspective......

The interesting thing is that I know better.....I know better than to let this happen.....I know that perspective is something I can control and yet I am allowing others to control my perspective.....

Reminds me of Paul......I know better...yet I allow it to happen...and participate in it......

Perspective begins with an acknowledgement that God is painting on a canvas larger than we can see or imagine.....I think Louie Giglio said something like that in a sermon I recently watched on the internet.....trust is essential....

I'm a work in progress....

1 comment:

Marsha said...

I sooooo understand---my van was detailed this week by a friend's son---he called and said that it needed MAJOR work--well---I DON"T WANNA---
Blessings,
Marsha