Thursday, November 02, 2006

Endure it or Embrace it?

At some level, I am beginning to realize that I think I want to make the choice to embrace life instead of just trying to endure life. This has been on my mind since Halloween when I had the BEST time just watching my kids trick or treat. Sounds pretty simple. Why was watching them trick or treat such a sacred moment for me? The best I can figure is that I am beginning to make that choice to embrace life...to embrace the holidays...to embrace and treasure the moments of pure joy.

Maybe it is like someone who has been on a trip to another country and when they get back they can't wait to enjoy all the familiar foods and activities they missed out on while they were gone. I feel like I lost a whole year or so of my life...not much appetite for anything...and it definitely felt like I was living in another world (not just another country). I am like the weary traveler returning home....cherishing every last bite of the familiar....of the things longed for.

I have no idea how the holidays are going to hit me this year. Last year they sucked. But, Halloween has given me hope that I am returning "home" emotionally....that I am going to embrace them and enjoy them in a way that I have never experienced before. Sure, there will be down times...times when I am sad....but, I am hopeful that embracing the holidays will be an achieveable goal for me...I'll keep you posted....

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