For the first three and a half decades of my life I think I had this "connect the dots" theology about my life and God's plan for my life. In other words, I thought God had this grand "connect the dots" plan for my life and all I had to do was make sure I understood where the next dot was. That theology came from passages like Jeremiah 29:11 where it seems to indicate that God has a plan for us...a good plan...plans to give us a hope and a future. Well, that worked pretty well for me until now. I have struggled and agonized over "God's plan" for my life. I would say that I have even been "obsessed" with trying to figure out His plan. All of this struggle was, of course, brought on and exacerbated by the death of my husband. Prior to his death, it seemed as though I understood God and I understood the direction our lives were heading. Life was pretty predictable and God made sense to me...
Fast forward to today....after 15 months worth of thinking, analyzing, searching....I no longer believe in a "connect the dots" theology. I look at Scriptures and find very few passages that talk about a specific plan for each of us...a connect the dot picture....the majority of references that talk about a "plan" are pointing out the uselessness of man and his plans. Instead, they usually focus on "God's purposes" instead of "God's plan". I also didn't find any passages where Jesus talks about a "plan" for each of us (feel free to point out passages that you find).
My conclusion: I need to focus less on figuring out God' s plan for my life and more on God's purposes being accomplished in my life. I am not saying that God doesn't have a plan. I believe he did or does (insert prior to the fall type notions versus the sinful world) have a plan. However, it is not something I could comprehend. I liken it to the internet. If I could have a discussion with the inventor of the internet (which wasn't Al Gore) and I were to ask him "How does the internet work?" I think he would look at me and know that there was no way I could understand the complexities of the millions of lines of code that it took to create the internet. So, I don't think he would even attempt to answer that question. Instead, I think he would focus on the purposes and benefits of the internet. Same thing with God. Yes, there are millions of lines of code...yes, God does understand them and know them for each one of us. Nope, I can't understand it. So, instead God tells me to focus on His purposes. He tells me trust Him, not understand Him. That's where I am at....trusting...not understanding...and I am ok with that...for now.
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11 comments:
"My conclusion: I need to focus less on figuring out God' s plan for my life and more on God's purposes being accomplished in my life."
Wow, this is true wisdom! I found you via Bruce. Nice blog you have here! I'll read some more.
Interesting thoughts Shelly. I've never thought of our theology as being a connect-the-dots kind of thing, but that is a very traditional way of looking at things. The more I grow in His grace and knowledge the further I get from a traditional way of thinking. Don't get me wrong, with so many years of Baptist doctrine it's going to take me a while, but I'm trying.
B~
Bruce,
I am not sure I explained all of my rationale for the "connect the dots" analogy...it stems from this fear that I am going to get off track...that instead of going 1 to 100 in the right order that somehow I missed one in the past or I am going to miss one in the future...which would totally change the picture...it felt like a lot of pressure to look at my life that way....it also made me question a lot of things that really didn't need to be questioned. So, if I free myself from that thinking, it seems to help me understand how I ended up where I am at now...that it isn't punishment or something...that I didn't get off track and somehow end up here by mistake...doomed to a lousy life.
I think the older I get, the less I know....and the more tradition doesn't always make sense. I am grateful for the Baptist tradition and doctrine, just not married to it anymore.
Found you via Bruce.......wisdom....can I come back and lurk awhile.....
We are all afraid of missing a dot or two, and then feeling our "picture" may all be wrong, not the one God had intended for us, and that's a hard path to go down. It's definately true, the older we get the less we know. :-) I hope we can explore this thought a little further. If our lives aren't a series of dots connected together, what is it?
B~
It is nice to see some new friends here. Welcome. Lurk any time.
Bruce,
I was hoping you had the answer! I will keep thinking on that....in the meantime, enlighten me if you have a better word picture.
Well...well...looks like an interesting discussion. I like Bruce's question: If life isn't a connect the dot picture, what is it? I don't think there's an answer to that question. I think that's part of the mystery of it all or maybe the point of the whole discussion. When you throw out the dot-to-dot way of thinking, it fress you up to not have to "get it exactly right" to make whatever picture life is suppose to be. Just random thoughts with Smitty
"Trusting-not understanding-and I'm ok with that for now"
Hummmm....
That could be cause for conversation later.
When I look at a connect-the-dot picture I see a rough drawing of something, recognizable but crude. Connect-the-dot pictures are about the same thing as paint-by-number paintings - not real art. And no matter who does the connect-the-dot picture or paint-by-numbers painting, it will always turnout looking the same. But when a true artist draws something, or paints something, there is a unique quality to it, beauty and depth unachieveable with the connect-the-dots. So it is with our faith and theology. The church today tends towards the connect-the-dots or paint-by-numbers, thereby turning out exact replicas each and every time. When we let God, the true artist, paint our faith and theology we come out with uniqueness and depth and beauty. What say you?
B~
BTW, I'm glad you and smitty are now blogging. I've really enjoyed reading your thoughts.
Ok...now we are getting somewhere. Bruce, great analogy. I like it..it works for me. "Control" also seems to play a role in the "connect the dots theology". It seems to give us a measure of control or at least think we have control. So, are we the artist or the canvas? I think God is probably the artist...so what is our role...how do we help shape the picture. Obviously, we bear some responsibility for how it turns out...I'll keep thinking....
Could it be that our role in the drawing is to allow God to mold us into whatever it is that achieves His purpose for our lives? Not a step-by-step plan, but an overarching purpose. One that looks at the big picture. Or perhaps our role in all of this is to give God that which He most desires, our love and our true worship.
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